As simple as the title of this post sounds it's not the same as doing what it says. Many times I have heard some men say: I don't understand what she wants.  What else does she wants me to do that I have not done? Oh! It's true it could be hard for men to understand women sometimes, but therein lies their beauty. One of the beauties of women is their complexity and that's why a man needs wisdom and intelligence to be a better lover. It takes more than masculinity to be a desirable man in the sight of any woman. You need a lot of skills and intuition to keep a good home, it's why they say love is work so if you know you can't do the work then you can't love at all.

Women all around the world may have the same feminine genetic composition but differ in their expression and definitions of being loved. However,  this doesn't mean they don't have general desires which are particular to women folks. Women have so many things in common which they desire from men and among those things are as follow:


As much as it's good for a man to learn how to talk or chat with his wife, it's also good to be A GOOD LISTENER. Listening means a lot to women folks because it makes them feel loved and respected by their men. Listening is not the same as hearing. You could be hearing what your woman is saying but not listening to her. Listening to a woman is defined as paying attention to what she's saying and what she's not saying, Sometimes the only way she communicates in through her body language. A man needs to read her body language to understand what she wants sometimes. When a woman is talking to you she wants you to be looking into her eyes because that's the window she uses to peep into your soul. To listen to a woman is to look into her eyes when she's talking, don't interrupt her when she's talking to you, take time to process your response so you can be sure you understand what she's saying. fortunately, this is not so hard for any man to learn if he desires to. If you do not understand what she's saying tell her to say it again. Watching TV, playing games, texting with your phone or talking to someone else when she's talking to you is not listening to her. "It's why they say cell phone could sometimes be something that makes you close to people who are far from you while it makes you far from someone who is right next to you". Women don't want their men's attention to be divided when they're talking to them; women don't like to compete with anything for your attention when they're talking to you. If you want to be a better lover you should work on your listening ability. And when all has been said by her make sure you correct that which she wants you to work on because listening is not complete until the change has occurred where she wants you to work on. Listening to her complaints and becoming better by not repeating what she complained about is what makes her know you listen to her. A LOVING MAN IS A MAN WHO LISTENS TO HIS WIFE AND CHANGE FOR BETTER.


Show me a man who makes life easy for his spouse and I'll show you a man who enjoys his spouse. Challenges of life can break a woman down when she's on the edge, but she feels loved when her man puts his hand on her shoulder, calms her down and tells her to step away while he faces the task for her. Women love a man who can give helping hand when they need it. There's nothing wrong in helping your spouse do her house chores sometimes while she takes care of another side of the family life. Family life is so demanding that it cannot be left for a woman alone. As a man no matter how big your status in the society you can never feel too big to do any house chore for your parents. So why not your spouse? Why some men are not enjoying their wives is because of their pride that a man shouldn't do anything at home. When you allow your wife to overwork she'd have no option but to break down and a broken vessel can hardly be useful when needed. It's high time men learned that helping your wife means you care for her. A woman who has the help of her man will always have her man's back when the situation calls for it. If you want your spouse to love you very well learn to help her sometimes. There's no big deal in it. I'm preaching it because I do it and it works for me and thousands of men who do it all around the world. please learn to help your spouse.


What is chivalry? "It means showing gracious courtesy and high-minded consideration to a woman". This is a simple term means BEING A DISTINGUISHED GENTLEMAN. The act of gentleness to your spouse is something that'll endear her to you for as long as you practice it. Women love being spoilt so a little bit of helping her to carry her back sometimes won't hurt but help you enjoy your love life with her. Unfortunately, African society sees this as a taboo; they see a man who shows his wife love by carrying her bag as a man who has no balls or value in life. They often ask such a man if he is the husband or his wife is the husband in their relationship.  Smh......If you know what you're doing as a man you shouldn't look at the societal reaction before you do what helps your love life to get better, at the end of the day nobody feels the pain if the happiness in your relationship go sour but you and your spouse. Let you and your spouse come first without minding what the people say.

 Be a gentleman, a loving man, a good listener and a helpful man if you want your spouse to do the same in return. You cannot plant thorn hoping to make the flower out of it. What you sow is what you reap in life.

It doesn't take much to love a woman, yet it takes much if you don't know the right things to do as a man. And why not start today by doing those above mentioned? It' not too much to do I tell you. May You enjoy happiness in life in God's name. Amen.

Note: A woman can also learn from this because no knowledge is waste. If you don’t need it today you might need it later to train your sons. Real mothers are needed to train their boys on how to love their women when they grow up.

Warning: If you look at what your friends might say you won't do what you're supposed to do. At the same time, you could be shocked that none of them cares about what you do after all. Do the right thing to your spouse so she can do the right thing to you.

Kindly share this post with those you love, and comments and contributions are encouraged on this forum.

Yours' Truly,

Adebiyi Abraham

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